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her space, her thoughts.....
HER SANCTUARY ♥
Tuesday, May 15, 2007



Witnessed a "lovers' quarrel" on my way back from uni today, and let me assure you that it's not a pretty sight to behold.


Perhaps I should give you a little idea of what happened.


There I was, about to approach a crossroad when I heard:



"YOU F**KING BROKE MY HEART!!!!"


Didn't see anyone yet, but it sounded as though the voice came from the front. I finally saw a girl trying to cross the road. Following her closely was this boy, bellowing at the top of his lungs for all to hear:


" YOU F**KING IDIOT!!!"


"HOW DARE YOU DO THIS TO ME!!!"


"YOU BROKE MY HEART, DO YOU KNOW THAT???"


"YOU F**KING BROKE MY HEART!!!"


"ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME???"


"ARE YOU F**KING DEAF???"


"HEY, I'M TALKING TO YOU HERE!!!"


"COME BACK HERE, YOU LITTLE....."


He went on, hurling "colourful" expletives like there was no tomorrow. The girl, on the other hand, kept quiet throughout and did not turn back. Not even one bit. (I later realized that she lives just three houses away from me. swt.)


The verbal attack continued even after I entered my uncle's home. I know that because I could still hear his voice. Wasn't too long before I heard some banging, and another voice outside:


"WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE??"


"WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM HER???"


"GO AWAY!!"


"NOW BEFORE I CALL...."


I assumed that was the girl's male relative. (-_-)


Now how did the boy with that "amazing range of vocabulary" respond?


"I'M SORRY!!!"


"I'M JUST A CHILD!"


"I'M JUST A CHILD....."


(-_-") (-_-") (-_-") (-_-") (-_-")

(The voices died down thereafter, so I guess that fella really did scram after all. Good riddance)


Yes, I've seen people swear in public before....here being more common (and even more explicit) in comparison to what I've witnessed back home. Heck, my friends and I even curse (under our breaths of course) every now and then, so it normally doesn't bother me much. Nevertheless, THIS "yelling spree" here really takes the cake - almost made my ears bleed.


The "best" bit? Those two lovers looked no more than 17 years old...


GG.

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Wednesday, May 09, 2007

27 more days before my first major exam in Melbourne....and we've got to cover a crap-load of microbiology and immunology, a large portion of which being research-based and oh-not-so- clinically relevant. Being bombarded with molecular oncology in the last two days isn't helping at all either. Granted p53 mutation is a very common attribute to various cancers, and this makes all the more reason for us to be aware of. Nevertheless, do we really need to know that p53 is regulated by MDM2, which in turn is inhibited by p14ARF....and that p53 controls regulation of p21, which in turn regulates Rb phosphorylation in the E2F/DP1/Rb complex formation, along with another CDKI known as p14ARF.....yadayadayada. Very "sien" of studying already la.

My only consolation? This situation isn't so bad, in comparison to what a few of my medic friends are currently doing. Makes me wonder at times - how did they manage to pull through, juggling between ward rounds, night shifts, clinical presentations, research papers, written assignments, nasty consultants, horrible OSCEs and all? *salutes*


SO PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER, WOMAN!!! ><"


On a lighter note, was delighted to receive birthday wishes from many people this year - family members, fellow M104s, M204s and M107s of IMU, UPM medics whom I've met during my brief hospital attachment at HKL last year, fellow Trinitarians, my old schoolmates....and even from a portion whom (I thought) I've lost contact with! XD


I thank you all - for the birthday greetings, heartfelt e-mails and offline messages, surprise telephone calls, those lovely birthday comments you placed on my friendster account, and for taking the trouble to come all the way from the suburbs to celebrate the occasion. =)


Aha, and speaking of "surprise" birthday parties.....


Ganesh, Chun Peng, Wen Hao, Darren, Kai Sin, Chung Yew, Wee jie, Matt and Kang Meng also took the trouble to hold a mini birthday celebration. Was seriously touched by their gesture, even though a mix-up led them to think I was born on 28th April instead, and so held that little party two weeks before my actual birthday!! lol. Being a person who is not caught by surprise so often, that was obviously one occasion I did not expect. =P


I still LMAO whenever I think of it. ^^

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Tuesday, May 01, 2007

It never occured to me.


How difficult it would be, learning something you could clearly identify with, grappling issues you have experienced before.


How painful it was, when others highlighted subjects on cancer, death and bereavement, while one's mind raced back into the past.


How akward it became, when my voice started to break, when I could hardly complete sentences, when tears welled...


How foolish and angry I felt, when this was all happening during my HP tutorial, at a time and place where no one really knew what happened to my grandmother.


Stupid stupid girl. This might not happen if you've kept things to yourself.


How I fervently wished time and again that class would end sooner, so I could flee.


How emotional and helpless I became at the end of it all, despite thinking I've gotten over it.


How touched I was when Aisyah and Charlotte tried to help.


How shocked I was when Brett (HP tutor) apologized after class.



And I thought I could share some of my experiences with them....on coping with cancer, on challenges my family faced.


It still hurts, deep down inside.


I guess I'm not ready yet.



If only....

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